Thursday, April 14, 2011

Stranger Things Have Happened, But This Is Near the Top of the List

My mom and I made a trip to the always charming Wally World today. And I would like to start off by saying that every time I go there, I always have a list of the things I need to get, and then end up in the check-out line with about 50 other things that I don't need, but when I try to convince myself that I don't really need the five candles, and the new Fuzz-Buster that I found, I just can't seem to part with them. So needless to say, I always end up spending at least $50 at Wal-Mart. However! There is hope for me yet! I walked out of The Big Blue Giant without spending over $20 today. Victory is mine!!

In other news, aka the real reason for this post, on our way out to the car, my mom decided she wanted to stop in the eyeglass place and look at some new frames, because she needs new ones. And I mean that. She hasn't had new glasses in about ten years, which means her glasses are like the ones Fuller wears in Home Alone. Eek. (Ok, so maybe that's an exaggeration, but still. They're pretty bad.) Well, we had been in the little shop for about twenty minutes and she had actually found some frames she liked that I approved of. ( I had warned her she was not allowed to look like Harry Potter when our excursion was over, thankfully she listened.) We had narrowed down the frames she liked to about three pairs, and they were having a deal that made it cheap enough that she could get two of the three pairs if she wanted to. Well, out of nowhere, this slightly hyper looking woman came at us and started babbling about how the frames she had picked made her look old (which they didn't), and she shouldn't get those she should go for a "fun" look instead, and she was talking at about 500 miles per hour. It would be an understatement to say we were surprised that a.) she was so bold, and b.) how hyper she was. Not to mention the fact she was like, 50 something and had flaming red hair. At first all we could do was sit there and stare at each other like, "the fuck is this hag going on about?"

After the woman had dragged my unsuspecting mother away from me, and taken over my consulting job, she tried to force about twenty pairs of glasses on her face that didn't fit her at all. It was like she was trying to get my mom to look like she had just stepped out of a Teen Vogue "Glasses Edition" or something. And let's be honest. My mom dresses like a mom, not a fashonista, so there is no way she has any business in a pair of bright pink glasses with rhinestones on the side in the shape of a heart. Soon enough though, my mom was able to escape the wrath of crazy glasses lady, and we hightailed it outta there like nobody's bidness.

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